Who?

Do you recognize who this bitch is?

Click the pics to find out.

KFed hates Pokerface.

Stan Van Gundy or Ron Jeremy

I am convinced you will never see these two in the same place.

One is the coach for the Orlando Magic and one is the Hedgehog.

KFed thinks the Magic will be the dark horse in the 2009-10 season.

Two LaQ Sisters Two Different Stories

This plot keeps thickening.

LaQuisha Middleton and LaQuanda Price have told different stories about what happened to Dr. Conrad Murray's storage unit.

Someone is not telling the truth.

KFed thinks they are so busted.

Kyle Korver or Ashton Kutcher

I am convinced you will never see these two in the same place.

One plays for the Utah Jazz and the other one tweets.

KFed thinks Korver is a pretty solid defender.

Kate Gosselin

I always get upset with Kate. This self-important bitch drives me nuts. Sometimes she wins me over and it isn't that hard to do. Her wonderful melons have calmed me down today.

Great job, Kate. I am sure you will return to your regularly scheduled bitchiness tomorrow.

KFed wants to be breast fed.

Whose High School Picture?

Click the wig-wearing gold digging bitch to find out.

KFed thinks Big Poppa is a moron.

Lady GaGa Sucks

One day Lady GaGa will go away.

One day I will not have to put ice on my eyes.

One day her ridiculous costumes will be on eBay.

One day she will end up on "Celebrity Rehab".

One day I will see her DUI mugshot on TMZ.

One day...

Nothing can make me like this woman. A wardrobe with her tits hanging out just makes me angry. She tries hard for attention with her ridiculous outfits. I don't understand the fascination with this woman. She sucks.

I fucking hate you, GaGa.

KFed loves breasts.

Redemption

In one week, Lisa Rinna had transformed herself into the bikini body we have all come to love. I am not sure how she achieved this in such a short time but she pulled it off. This woman is incredible. I don't care about what parts are plastic or injected.

KFed is a fan of both Lisa's.

UFC Fight: Rowe vs Bono

Debbie Rowe vs Chastity 'Chaz' Bono

This would be an incredible fight.

KFed thinks Debbie has an edge because of all the media scrutiny.

Kevin Federline Enjoys Things

Ever since retiring from knocking up pop stars, Kevin Federline has embarked on a mission of golf and food. Kevin's efforts to find the best links and buffets must be exhaustive. Not bad for a back-up dancer. This guy laughs all the way to the bank.

Keep up the good work.

KFed has no comment.

Famewhore Alert

A national famewhore alert has been sent out for Holly Letchworth. This bitch had been previously linked to Jesse McCartney and now is linked to Nick Lachey. She is moving from D list to C list and is on the prowl.

Please do not engage her in conversation. She seeks fame and is considered dangerous.

KFed would love Holly to be his whore.

Tara Reid is Smart

Tara Reid makes me think I am in 1999. Nothing has changed for over 10 years. This woman is paid to party. This time she is partying it up in St. Tropez. Somebody better tell the French that Tara is no longer relevant. Until then, Tara will be globetrotting and laughing in the face of society as she cashes her $25,000 checks per appearance.

KFed thinks banging a crazy bitch is the best kind of sex.

Katie Price has Two More Children

Are you kidding, Katie? This is over-the-top. Look at those things. You must have really upset your future ex-husband to file for divorce. I would never let those bad boys go. It is a shame you are only famous in England.

How about you take your two friends and set up shop in Los Angeles?

KFed is stunned.

The Good Thing About Katy

The only good thing about you is your breasts. Then you had to go and put some fake John Mayer-light tattoo on them. Go with what you know, your melons.

The next time you have a great idea put a tattoo above your fucking vagoiche. I have always wanted to see if you have waxed floors or a strip.

KFed loves the vagoiche.

Remember...

Anne Ramsey has been gone for almost 20 years but her acting lives on. Her unforgettable roles in 'Goonies' and 'Throw Momma from the Train' are classics. Her trademark yell and slurred speech were legendary.

I salute you, Anne!

KFed hasn't seen Goonies in a long time.

Reggie Bush Loses 140lbs

It looks like Reggie Bush finally came to his senses and broke things off with Kim Kardashian. This restores my faith in society. A NFL player should be able to do much better than a wanna-be reality celebrity. I don't care what their PR teams have stated as the reason. I am certain he was sick of her shit and didn't want to deal with it at the beginning of the football season.

This day should be celebrated.

KFed fears Khloe Kardashian more than any other woman.

Madonna is Healthy

I am glad to see Madonna looking natural. I am sure her team of nutritionists are all over her body sculpting. She looks fantastic.

I hear Wes Craven is looking for a new character to terrorize a neighborhood.

KFed eats meat.

Jason Wahler Thinks Things Through

This guy got kicked off a film for 'bad behavior'. Who in their right mind thought he was an actor? If you stacked douche 6 feet 2 inches high, you will have Jason Wahler. This kid needs to go away and work a real job that he can handle like a Wendy's drive-thru.

Fuck you Jason.

KFed loves Wendy's double stacks.

Why So Serious?

You would think that being handed the keys to the kingdom would make you happy every single day of your life. Not the case with this sign of the Apocalypse, Shia LeBeouf. Mr Happy doesn't like his picture being taken while he is in public. I have seen Eagle Eye and Transformers and this fucktard should be grateful anyone wants to see him.

I only wish the other hand was fucked up and his jaw was wired shut. I would pay $12 to see that for sure.

KFed wonders where all the anger comes from.

Douche Summit

An important meeting to further the douche agenda took place recently. Jon Gosselin and Michael Lohan convened in a New York location to discuss the levity of douche. The two leaders discussed the need to explore the opportunities and challenges that face both current and future generations of douche.

Godspeed gentlemen.

KFed thinks these two will lead the charge of the Apocalypse.

Why

Never leave money on the table. I was told that once.

The smartest woman on the planet has inked a deal with a European-based company to deliver a reality show. They are going to give her and her kids $250K for one month of work.

Octobitch looks like the Mona Lisa with the half smile all the fucking time. She has always known she would cash in on the kids. Someone is smart and it isn't me.

KFed wonders if a reality show could be based around his life.

Omer Bhatti Loves Attention

This moron, Omer Bhatti would tell people he was Michael Jackson's secret son. Apparently the Jackson family were also hip to this. Omer told one of MJ's nephews that he called himself 'Michael J' and that Michael was his father. He was spotted running around Neverland Ranch for years after that.

Someone tell Omer he is a stupid fuck who created this fantasy.

KFed will never understand famewhores.

Kristen Stewart is Funny

Kristen Stewart joked with everyone at Comic-con with this little gem, "I can't wait to get pregnant."

I don't find anything funny or appealing about this bitch. I can't take another second of the Twilight-mania that is sweeping this nation of tweens. It makes me want to kill myself. I fear the future.

KFed thinks that God is mad at the world.

Michael Jackson was Dead

This shouldn't be a shock to anyone but Michael Jackson was dead before the paramedics got there. He wasn't breathing to begin with. Everyone is selling him out in death. Better stories are on the way.

KFed can't stop staring at the picture.

Whitney Port

I understand why they gave Whitney her own show. I choose to watch it with the sound off. Does it really matter what she has to say? Didn't think so.

KFed loves the Rolex in the pool.

Dane Cook May be a Douche

His half-brother is worse. He allegedly ripped Dane off for millions. No matter how bad you are as a comedian you don't deserve to be ripped off.

I wonder if Dane will give back the money that was spend on Employee of the Month?

KFed would never steal jokes or do terrible movies.

Stephen Baldwin is in Financial Trouble

The man who speaks of Jesus wherever he goes is in financial trouble. I am not sure if Jesus is in the banking industry. Better take a loan from your brother. I don't want any of my tax dollars to help you out at all.

KFed thinks this is one of the Baldwin brothers that doesn't count.

Emma Watson Selects a University

Fake Real

The Dirty claims this picture of Emma Watson is real. The picture has been proven to be a fake. It is amazing because Nik Richie is usually right. Not this time.

I would bang her no matter what.

Click the bitch to find out where she will attend college.

KFed never saw Harry Potter.

Eva Mendes is Ridiculous

There is no photoshopping going on in this picture.

She is just that hot.

Uncensored Eva Mendes Calvin Klein Commercial - Funny videos are here

KFed loves this woman.

James Caan is the Man

You have to hand it to James Caan. He is as old as the Bible and he still goes to Hollywood bars to pick up girls. He has outlived the relevancy of the Playboy Mansion and continues on a vagoiche spree.

I salute James Caan. Never give up.

KFed wonders if he takes a little blue pill.

Cameron Diaz Loves to get Hers

According to the Sun, Cameron Diaz is juggling men. She is allegedly banging around with Leonardo DiCaprio and Jude Law. It is about time this dirty girl got some extra innings on the field.

KFed loves double shifting.

Mickey Rourke Scares Me

Promoting Iron Man 2, Mickey Rourke is going to be on a panel during Comic-con in San Diego. There was no need for this much plastic surgery. He was the guy in 9 1/2 weeks and that alone should have worked for chicks. Instead he wanted to hold on to his youth and that went horribly wrong.

KFed can't wait for Iron Man 2.

Jordin Sparks

Imagine a younger Oprah who can sing. Then you have Jordin Sparks.

She was a former American Idol who is only 19. Not exactly sure what songs she sings but I know she did a duet with Chris "Woman-beater" Brown. I hope she stays clear of that dickwad.

KFed loves some junk in the trunk.

KFed loves some junk in the trunk.

Jamie Kennedy Quit Life

Jamie Kennedy is engaged to Jennifer Love Hewitt. This probably means that Jamie has given up on life. He plans to sail out in obscurity on Jennifer's cash. I am not sure if he is really smart or really stupid. Jennifer is notorious for changing her mind and cheating.

Best of luck, Jamie.

KFed thinks this is a huge mistake.

The Miami Dolphins are Doomed

These two are now partial owners of the Miami Dolphins. This almost guarantees destruction of the team. It is also an indication of the impending Apocalypse. Fear the future. You will see these two morons piloting a chariot of fire.

The end is near.

KFed is afraid, very afraid.

Katie Price aka Jordan has a Plan

Katie has returned to England with a plan.

1. get a large back tattoo of hearts and crowns
2. take acting lessons

I think Katie's best bet is to avoid inking her body any more. She already has a stupid tattoo on her wrist. Slow down on the ink, Katie. As far as the acting lessons, don't bother. Better to see Katie on paper than to see her act. Just be a hot mess and shut the fuck up.

KFed doesn't mind the ink.

Seth Rogen

A wise man once told me, "Act like your detractors don't exist. Never comment on things they say because that will only give them credence."

The best thing for Seth Rogen to do would be to never acknowledge a hater. He called the creator of Entourage an 'asshole' and 'moron'. Seth Rogen's movies have been huge with some minor exceptions. His box office would be the envy of many.

Here should be Seth's response, "Never heard of him."

KFed loves Superbad.