Daisy has been Abducted

A coyote has been seen running off with Jessica Simpson's dog.

KFed is hoping for a safe return.

Jessica Simpson Tweet

She must be going back to her Chicken of the Sea roots.

The dumb act is getting old. The music career is over. I know another reality show is in the works but this is ridiculous.

Please go away quietly but leave your breasts.

KFed doesn't think this is an act.

Tony Romo's Biggest Touchdown

Thank God. Tony Romo finally let that bitch with the big breasts go. I can't imagine the sex being all that good. After the first few times of banging with her, he should have let her on her merry way. No need to keep the bitch as a permanent anything.

KFed would love sloppy seconds here.

Jessica Simpson

It looks like you got hit in the back with 2 HELLFIRE missiles.

I wish my penis was that mic.

KFed thinks stripes are in for this Summer.

Holy Melons

No matter what her weight is...

Jessica Simpson's bazoombas are fucking great.

KFed loves the produce section.

Jessica Simpson

Someone makes it to dinner. Every single time.

KFed still wants to see her tits.